Not That Easy
by Callisto-HK
Summary: Short, AU-ish tag to 10x03. 'Soul Survivor'.. *Spoiler Alert*.. Dean- Or well, the demon!Dean had warned him, but it wasn't like he had any other choices. Right? He couldn't help feeling scared, though; he couldn't lose his brother now. Not again! / Read the A/N, please. /Rated K-plus for a few chosen words.


**_A/N: FIRST O**_F ALL; if you haven't seen episode three and you don't want any spoilers then don't go any further; because even though things didn't happen this way on the show, it's clear what happened there that mattered the most._**_**

**_OK, this is a VERY short tag to 'Soul Survivor'; its ending didn't satisfy me; I didn't get enough worried!Sam and definitely not enough hurt Dean (read NO hurt Dean, AT ALL!) and it kinda seemed like the writers didn't want to spend too much time on Dean going through the process of becoming human again. Thank God for directors like Jensen; I believe he saved the episode with his acting AND his directing; but sadly, he couldn't do anything with the sudden jump in the storyline; so, I had to change it a bit, myself. I don't know if I'll find any free time to go further with this one or not; so I'll call it a one-shot for now._**

**_This goes AU from the moment Dean opened his eyes and was back to himself._**

**_Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy. Please share your thoughts with me._**

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><p>"Welcome back, Dean." Sam smiled with relief, feeling like the weight of the world had suddenly been lifted off his shoulders; clearly it was because his older brother was back; but secretly he knew that meant the burden was probably mostly back on Dean's shoulder again, because he wouldn't let Sam be the sole bearer of that heavy burden; he'd try to either take it all alone or at least take it as much as possible if that meant Sam wouldn't suffer and at that moment Sam really needed his big brother to help him with it.<p>

Stepping forward, Sam started to take care of the ropes and cuffs around Dean's right arm as Cas went to Dean's left to do the same; both expecting to see Dean stretching his body and complaining about rope burns; what neither one expected was for Dean to collapse forward the moment he was free of his bonds.

Surprised by the sudden change of events, Sam, with just one hand, struggled to keep Dean from falling to the ground head first, especially since it took Castiel longer to overcome his shock and adjust his grip on Dean's left shoulder.

Finally, together they lowered Dean to ground; Sam felt his heart plummet as he realized that once again Dean had lost consciousness, and this time, his breathing sounded erratic and he remained unresponsive no matter what they did.

"O God; what have I done, Cas?"

"Calm down, Sam. Dean's body has been through a lot lately; he's probably just drained. He needs rest and you know as well as I, that you had no other choice; so stop doubting yourself." Cas replied in a totally calm tone of voice.

Despite what Cas had said, Sam grabbed Dean's shirt and started to pull his T-shirt up to assess his situation more carefully. At the sight of the scar on Dean's chest he visibly cringed, remembering the moment that Dean got stabbed by that bastard, Metatron and then dying in his arms and... .

Shaking his head, he looked up at the angel standing beside him; "Shouldn't the scar have completely faded away since it was healed and Dean came back to life?"

Castiel shrugged, feeling confused at what he was seeing. "Yes. I don't understand why that has left a scar."

"Do something." Sam demanded when Cas just stood there and watched as Dean remained motionless on the ground.

Cas looked between them and then said, "Maybe we should just let him rest; I'm not sure healing him miraculously is a wise thing to do now."

"Why the hell not?" Sam's eyes were wide. "He's clearly not as fine as we thought he'd be and you can help him. Why won't you?"

"Sam, I can heal his body. But we both know that he's suffered greatly, mentally as well as physically. If we let his body take its right time to heal, his mind will find the time to heal, as well. There's a reason God wouldn't let us heal humans miraculously. You know perfectly well that if Dean feels physically strong enough to walk around, he would once again bury his weariness and spiritual pain and would go hunting. Is that what you want?"

Sam's shoulders slumped as he realized that Cas had a point. "For all we know, Dean could never go back to being his old self."

"Which old self?" Cas prodded gently. "The one before going to Hell? Sam, the last few years haven't been easy on him; few weeks of not being himself couldn't have done much more damage." '_Hopefully!'_ Cas added silently.

Sam gritted his teeth and bit his lip to keep it from trembling. "Could you... Can you at least make sure he's completely back?"

Cas sighed and decided not to point out that Sam had already made sure of that by pouring holy water on him. Instead he rolled up his sleeve and dug his hand into Dean's chest.

Merely 2 seconds later, Dean's eyes snapped open and he howled in pain, arching his back and pushing at the angel's hand. Immediately, Cas pulled his hand out as Sam grabbed Dean's right shoulder and held him, trying to calm his brother down by murmuring reassuring words, while looking at Castiel with questioning eyes.

"He's... His soul is there; bright and intact." Cas looked a bit shook-up but he reassured the younger Winchester nevertheless.

By then, Dean was panting hard, clutching at his chest.

"I don't understand why he's reacting this way, though." Cas continued, "and I believe despite being healed and alive, the damage to his lung had been too severe; maybe it's wise for you to get him to a hospital."

"Or, you could just heal him." Sam growled as he realized that once again Dean had gone limp under his hand.

"Sam." Cas stood up abruptly, "You don't get it; if my kind of healing could help, Dean wouldn't have a lung problem now; the mark on his arm had brought him back from death and it'd been way stronger than _my_ power. I can't help him now."

"If he's healed then-"

"That's the thing; he's been a demon this whole time; his body had healed itself and didn't suffer from any pain that'd affect human beings; but now that he's back to himself, some of the wounds and pains that haven't had any effect on his demonic form are attacking him. He might need a hospital eventually."

"If you can't help him, then neither can any doctor." Sam said dejectedly. "He... The demon said I might be killing him, but I-"

"You had no choice." Cas repeated firmly.

"I can't lose him, Cas." Sam grabbed Dean's shoulder and pulled him to himself. "Help me get him to his room."

Cas nodded his head and put his fingers on Dean's forehead and the next moment Dean was lying flat on his back on his memory foam in his room.

Sam walked in and sank into the bed next to his brother.

Cas watched him sadly. "His body needs time to adjust and heal, Sam. He's alive. If it'd just been the demon blood that was keeping him going, with the wound that Metatron inflicted on him, he'd be dead again, now. But look at him; his breathing might not be normal, but he's not getting worse. Give him time to heal."

"And if he got worse?"

"Take him to the hospital, then."

"You-"

"No, Sam." Cas shook his head. "It's not the right thing to do. If you don't let him heal slowly; mentally, he'd end up in a darker place than he was before confronting Metatron." The angel stepped back. "Be there for him; he still has that mark on his arm; the main problem is still there. You have to make him see that he can take some time; that he can take his time to get back on his feet and that he can count on you to be there for him through everything; that way he'd be able to control the mark until we find a way to get rid of it. _Timing is right, _Sam_; Heaven and Hell are reasonably back in order; _let him heal slowly_._"

Sam knew Castiel was right, but it didn't mean he wasn't scared or that he could stand seeing his brother looking so broken and by now it looked like Dean was in pain, too.

Looking up, he opened his mouth to ask Castiel to just at least take the pain away, but the angel was gone. Sam couldn't help himself; he cursed under his breath and clenched his fist to keep himself from punching anything. "I'll be right back, Dean." He said and stood up. "For God's sake, please be here when I come back, OK?"

He lingered by the door frame for a few seconds but then he walked out to grab something edible. Both he and Dean needed some food if they were going to heal and he was determined to be there for Dean to make sure he'd heal completely. He'd call and set a time for Dean to consult a pulmonary specialist to make sure the scar left on his lung wouldn't cause him any serious problem and he'd also make sure this time around, Dean wouldn't feel so isolated and desperate to do anything possible to save the world which would consequently feed the mark on his arm.

He couldn't lose Dean again.

Man, seemed like their journey had just begun; but at least, now, he was going to have his older_ brother_ by his side and he knew Dean wouldn't give up if he knew Sam was there for him, too and he'd be there for him. He'd learned his lessons.

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**... The END ...**

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><p><strong>AN: I'd love to know what you think.**

**The _italic_ part in Cas' dialogue was obviously taken from the show; I thought Cas could say the same words here, too; just not to Dean; to Sam!**

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**All mistakes are mine.**

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